60th Birthday Humor
To Help You Speak At A 60th Birthday Party

60th birthday humor is always welcome at a 60th Birthday party, whether you are simply telling a story, or sharing a joke with another person, or even better if you have been asked “to say a few words” as in a speech.

OR if you are responding to the words of someone else ...

There is something here for YOU.

If you would like to know how to find humor and how to make people laugh during your 60th Birthday Speech, by selecting jokes and adjusting them for this birthday, then here is the answer.

If you wish a few good words for this occasion, have a look at these special 60th birthday speeches.

If you feel anxious about speaking on this auspicious occasion, I have found music in particular helpful and other interesting ideas that help me relax.

Here are some ideas and birthday humor you may find helpful on the day.

Remember:

If you are speaking, use only a few relevant jokes that support what you are saying. Too many and you can become monotonous, especially if they do not really relate to the birthday person.

So here are five basic guidelines for your 60th birthday humor to help you bring on the laughs and good times:

  1. Short jokes and one-liners are best;
  2. Some personal stories about the Birthday person can spice up your message;
  3. A joke at the beginning (gains attention) and maybe at the end (ends on a good note) will make your words more memorable and persuasive;
  4. Always try to adapt a joke to the Birthday person – that way the audience will find it even funnier and personal;
  5. How to remember the joke? Know the story well, but memorise the punchline perhaps with a keyword or a recall word - the punchline well executed is the key.

Always select and adapt humor for your birthday speech and your audience will be thrilled.  It is not hard to do and can be done in minutes.

There is much here and even more.  Check out at the end.  There is no need to search everywhere for that right piece of humor, it's bound to be here.

Enjoy this 60th birthday humor.



60th Birthday Humor

Looking Forward

She was looking forward to her 60th birthday. But she was looking in the wrong direction.



60th Birthday Humor Cards - An Idea For The Words Inside Your Card

Mirror, mirror on the wall
Do you have to tell it all?
Where do you get the glaring right
To make my clothes look too darn tight?
I think I'm fine but I can see
You won't cooperate with me,
The way you let the shadows play
You'd think my hair was getting gray.
What's that, you say? A double chin?
No, that's the way the light comes in,
If you persist in peering so
You'll confiscate my facial glow,
And then if you're not hanging straight
You'll tell me next I'm gaining weight,
I'm really quite upset with you
For giving this distorted view;
I hate you being smug and wise
O, look what's happened to my thighs!
I warn you now, O mirrored wall,
Since we're not on speaking terms at all,
If I look like this in my new jeans
You'll find yourself in smithereens!!





Getting Older

"You know you're getting older when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there."



Birth

1. Margaret was so surprised by her birth, she was speechless for a year and a half.

2. Life is full of complications. Even when you are born there is a string attached.



The Birthday Study – It’s Proven !

It is proven that the celebration of birthdays is healthy. By reaching your 60th you are one of the healthiest in this room, because Statistics show that those people who celebrate the most birthdays become the oldest. -- S. den Hartog, Ph D. Thesis Universtity of Groningen.


Adapt this Sport Short Story

This Joke can be adapted to any Sport the Birthday person may play.

Leigh was just turning 60 and he had been playing golf all his life.

He comes home one day and said to his wife, "That's it, I will have to give up golf, my eyesight is that bad I can't see where the ball is going anymore."

His wife in trying to cheer him up replied, "I am sure you can give it one more go. Take my older brother with you."

"What good is that," replied Leigh. "He's nearly 90."

"He may be nearly 90 but his eyesight is perfect," replied his wife.

Next day, off they went to play golf. Leigh is a bit shaken up because of the previous day, but confident in his brother-in-law's eyesight. He tees up, breathes slowly and steps forward. And with an all mighty swing - drives the ball down the fairway.

He turns to his brother-in-law and asks, "Did you see the ball?"

"Of course Leigh" replied his brother-in-law. "I have perfect eyesight".

Leigh, all excited, turns back again and says "Where did it go?"

(Split second silence) "I don't remember".


One Liners For Those Who Exercise

Take care <name>.  My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she's 97 years old and we don't know where the hell she is.

Did you know that <name> joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks.  He/she hasn’t lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.

<Name> was telling me earlier/yesterday that he has found the secret to exercise!  The secret of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

<Name>, if you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

And last but not least: <Name> doesn’t exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of his/her glass.

You could run these walking jokes over to your friends but why not just e-mail it to them!

The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

(ROAST) <Name> has flabby thighs, but fortunately his stomach covers them.

(ROAST)  <Name> has to exercise early in the morning before his/her brain figures out what they’re doing.



QUESTION?

    Here is something for you ...

How Do You Select Humor, Then Adjust and Adapt Humor To Your Audience?

Selecting 60th birthday humor can be difficult, and then, making it fit (adjusting and adapting) to your audience is another thing.

After you do eventually find humor for your birthday speech you'll find it was NOT created for your audience. 

The good news though, is it is not hard to find humor and then easily change and adjust it so that your audience will think it was created just for them.

Here is how to select and adjust humor

... and find even more great 60th birthday humor as well

Here is how you can do that quickly.

As well there is a growing collection of more great birthday humor, so you do not have to hunt around to find your jokes and humor.

No more searching ...

Find the humor that works for you, then find out how to

    Select the Humor you need, Then
   
Adjust
and
    Adapt
this Humor To Your Audience?

Here is how you can do that quickly.

Have fun.
Warren


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